Wishful thinking?

Wishful thinking?

November 10, 2017 41 Comments

Wishful thinking?

I so want it to work. I want there to be a key in my environment, my diet, my life that I can change, avoid,  tweak, take, do that will fix my skin.

As in the photo above, my skin is a lot clearer and the redness reduced (esp from some of the mid flare photos). This is why I shot a new pic in the same pose. I have been grateful that my skin has been stable and relatively clear. A few spots and the odd moment of resurgent redness which has been comfortably kept at bay with steroids. There are currently so many moving parts involved as I started to throw the kitchen sink at this flare up. I don’t know if the improvement has been the steroids, the light treatment, the diet avoiding sugar, dairy and gluten. 

I so wanted it to be diet based, or just take a probiotic tablet solution. It seems this was optimistic or overly nieve. I have been consistent and restrained in my diet. Avoiding refined sugar, dairy and gluten. The first couple of weeks were easy and almost a novelty. Now I am growing a little frustrated and tired of it. Food restrictions just make things slightly more difficult, require slightly more planning and forethought. It is like me going swimming. I must work this out in advance, pack a decent quantity of moisturiser and then weigh up if it is worth the extra time to moisturise from head to toe. Eating has become the same. If I am going out, for dinner or worse lunch, what can I eat? Where will stock that?

It is even worse with Millie. Due to her chemotherapy and low white blood cell count Millie needs to follow a diet similar to during pregnancy. Only fresh that day, no rice, no bagged salads, mindful with deli meats etc. My go-to is sushi and Millies is a muffin. Easy enough in a busy area or mall but not so much out in suburbia. I had to go without anything yesterday lunch time because we stopped in a small town for lunch and it was all cabinet food of sandwiches, muffins, scones, rolls and savouries. I was hungry but diet won.

I am starting to notice people eating ice creams as the weather gets warmer. We went to the movies so I had an apple beforehand to help me stay away from temptation. It was my birthday, I had every excuse, but I want my skin sorted more. 

Unfortunately, as I ween myself off the steroids a familiar old pattern returns. I get a tickle sensation on my forehead. It feels dry, gets more sensitive and even a little raised. I try not to touch or scratch but I catch myself doing it. The redness and sensation spread to the other side of my forehead and the original spot intensifies. Soon my whole forehead and down the sides of my cheeks and neck are red and a little itchy. I apply moisturiser a lot more to try to slow, stop the itch and the spread. This is ultimately in vain as it moves and settles in.

This makes me question why am I depriving myself. Maybe the dermatologist was right and allergies and diet have minimal influence. But how do I control this inflammation? I do not want steroids to be routine.

I will persevere. I have committed until Christmas to stick with the diet. So far so good in terms of sticking with it. Now, to see some stable results would be heartening.



41 Responses

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September 26, 2020

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November 20, 2019

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November 20, 2019

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